looks like i'm in and there's no way out.
i don't know if i'm game enough for the challenge.
the thought of studying and memorising all the military stuff once more is dreading.
but come to think of it, i'm on the road less travelled by nsf.
how many were actually nominated for the acsm course, other than the regulars?
i am not the best, but being nominated affirms me of my attitude, proficiency and skills.
i am glad about that.
but because of all the good things and i get all the work, it's something to be depressed about.

sometimes i think to myself "so this is how it feels to let go and let God".
because i'm totally not in control anymore, and whatever happens i must accept and finish it.
because God will never give me more than what i can handle.
and i am trapped at the 'suck it up' feeling.
i guess God really wants to put me through shit to mould me.
becareful what you pray for!